Lessons Learned

A couple of lessons I thought I had mastered were reinforced yesterday while traveling to the City of Angels.

Lesson One: No kind deed goes unpunished.
I was booked in, settled in, strapped in and the flight attendant wanders down the aisle and is looking for someone to trade seats with a lady traveling with a small dog. She was in 3F, no under seat storage, I was in 5E, plenty of under seat storage. Apparently the mutt can't travel in the overhead bins. My hearing is diminishing just a bit, particularly on crowded airplanes and malls (this is why I can't hear my bride in the mall when she points out something she likes, I'm not ignoring, I can't hear) So I made the first tactical error by asking the flight attendant to repeat what she said..which forced us to make eye contact...which narrowed the conversation to just her and me..drat. Seeking to be an accommodating business traveler instead of what my youngest calls "those arrogant business men" I volunteered. Second tactical mistake, not checking who was in the seat beside me. The best description of my physical shape is that I am slightly "fluffy" as my D-i-L calls it, I prefer stocky. The guy next to me was, well, super-sized. Okay, in first class, not that big of a deal, but he did spill over into my side of the armrest. All through the flight I kept remembering the turf battles in the car with my two older brothers. "He's on my side!" "Am not!" "The line is right here" (drawing an imaginary line on the car seat)
I'm surprised my little sister was born with us three boys as the precursor. I wonder why we never took family vacations.hmm. Anyhoo, I kept my chagrin to myself and in a good-humored fashion took my seat...settled in, strapped in, ready to go.
Thus comes the second part of my mistake, the guy has a very ragged and constant cough. You know, the ones that seem to start deep in the chest and burst forth, causing all in range to duck and cower. No attempt to cover his mouth, no apologies, nada. Dude, I haven't gotten my annual flu shot, the H1N1 doesn't even come out for a month. I'm doomed. Next time the mutt can ride on the wing for all I care. Chances are they won't visit me in the hospital anyway. I'm telling you, being accommodating is overrated.

Lesson Two: Know your current events/people.
One of the other first class passengers was apparently a star of some sort. He and his 10-year-old kid had come to Dallas to see the Cowboy/Giants game (they were Giant's fans, I don't blame them after having to hear Jerry Jone's blather all year)
AS people filed on the plane, they kept trying to take his picture with their cell phones. This guy was right behind me, and I could not place his name. He looked vaguely familiar, but I had nothing. Finally, someone pointed out that he was on an HBO series called "Entourage" Okay, cool, I'm on a journey called life, let's give each other a break. This is not, however, my first time being clueless in the face of notoriety.
Several years ago I was flying on SW to Houston on some business deal and standing next to me in line was a tall, distinguished gentleman and his wife and I guess an aide of some sort. People kept looking past me at him and whispering. Finally, I turned to the guy and said, "You know, you look familiar, do I know you?" I thought his wife was going to hurt herself to keep from laughing. He replied, "I'm Lloyd Benson..." Oh yea, politician of some sort. So I made the only response I could, "Nice to meet you, I'm Don Jolly" At this point the aide was blocking the lane to prevent me from driving to the basket. My bride and kids have laughed about my obtuseness in the event for years. I have got to start watching TV instead of writing at night, I have no clue what is going on.

Well, on to other lessons.
Check your options before volunteering.
Cover your mouth.
Say, "Excuse me" when you have exposed others to a deadly illness.
Be kind to dogs...even little ones.
Read popular literature every once in a while.
Be cool around celebrities.
Leave your cell phone in your pocket...give the guy a break.
Man, there are a lot of lessons.

Godspeed,
Don