The theme of this blog for the years I have been creating it has been the events and the considerations that come from this journey we call life. The posts have been about the twists and turns, the moments of joy and the moments of tragedy, the successes and the set backs. Rarely has this blog dealt with the end of the journey.
But September 5, 2020 my dad, my mentor, my hero ended his journey of 98 years. With a body worn down by age and complications from hearing loss and dementia, he finally set his pack down and rested. We had all six sons (technically 3 were step-sons, but in this moment it was diffused distinction) each had a few moments to remember dad. The constant theme was that he was a simple, gracious, humorous, hard working man. He loved us all and embraced us all. Just the family he loved was over 80 people and every single one of them lovingly called him Grandfather. Each has a different memory of this man, each special in their own way.
So we spent the week thinking about him, remembering all the funny and poignant things he said and did. He loved puns and quirky little sayings. The last couple of years he would greet everyone with "I'm looking better!" Then explaining he could still see and was proud of that. With his memory issues, he would repeat this every time he saw someone, even if it was just a few moments before. And the graciousness of people who knew him would laugh each time and he would grin about his clever approach to old age. I never tired of seeing how much he enjoyed these word games.
His body had begun to wear down over the last several years. His memory was short cycled questions over and over again. He went through a time where he knew he was forgetting and it frustrated him. It was a blessing when he would forget, but not realize he had forgotten. It eased my heart to know he was not angry with himself over his memory. He was not as mobile as before and refused to use a walker, but as time went on even he had to concede that he needed assistance.
But in spite of all that was failing him, his memory, his hearing, his body, he remained sweet, gracious, humorous and faithful. Faithful to his God, faithful to his wife, faithful to all us. When it would have been easy to be bitter or mean, he remained who he truly had always been. Perhaps as we age and we begin to lose the independence, perhaps we reveal who we always were. And to me he revealed his greatness in his last moments by showing that the man he was years ago is still the same man today.
Godspeed to dad, Grady B. Jolly. You were truly one of a kind. And if I haven't said it enough, I love you and I will miss you.
Don
