He Knows My Name

I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in his hands

I have a Father
He calls me His own
He'll never leave me
No matter where I go

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And He hears me when I call

It is my experience that we all have moments in our lives that I call "wilderness time". It is time spent removed from the pace and flurry of all we find familiar. There have been a couple of these moments in my life. They can last for years, at least they have for me. The past couple of years has been wilderness time for me.

These wilderness moments do not reflect a loss of desire to follow the One. In fact, it is usually a time of incredible pursuit, of learning to live with the thundering silence, of living the disciplines when there is little or no reward. But it is also a time of great discernment, a time of learning, a time of appreciating the path not the goal.

But we are not led out of these moments in a dazzling flash of insight. There is no "aha" moment that signals the end of the wilderness time. There is no sudden thrust into the "busy-ness" of religious or secular life. I have found that it is a slow awakening. This past weekend I watched my youngest grandson try to wake from a long afternoon nap, snuggled close to his momma's neck, arms folded in close to her as he tried to make that transition from deep sleep to awake and interaction. It is this analogy of slowly finding our way back into the flow of life and service that marks the end of the wilderness time.

In the same way as my grandson, I find myself slowly transitioning back. As stressful as the wilderness time can be, it is still the moment that I find myself in. So I want to move slowly to make sure it is happening. When you have been through the time you begin to see and understand the early signs that the wilderness time is coming to an end. You can again perceive the words and warnings of others. My dear friends this weekend pointed out that my sense of humor was coming back, but it is still a little caustic. Only close and good friends can point that out and get away with it, and they were right. When one is still in the wilderness, you do not catch these early signs.

The song above has been on my mind for 2 days now. A sign that the wilderness is thinning a bit. I can hear the sounds of social civilization. You see part of the wilderness time is the thundering silence of God. I believe that the song is stuck in my head by Him. He knows my name..He knows my every thought..He sees each tear over the last couple of years..and He hears me when I call and cry and am left without words..

He knows my name..

Godspeed
Don