Lost Maples...

Sometimes an unexpected turn in the road surprises us with the greatest gifts. There was a group of us who wanted to take a trip, we didn't know where, but all of us being empty-nesters, we decided to take a car trip. After much research and debate, and a casual comment by my bride about "Lost Maples" we formed up plans. We decided on the weekend before Thanksgiving, probably because some of us had family duties. There was only one scheduling hitch that came late and entailed a late night drive with us guys, but other than that it was a good plan.

As the weekend unfolded it became evident that we had all been under some stress or other because we simply wanted to veg. No plans, no agendas, no appointments. We drove to Austin on Friday night, stayed in a hotel, got up the next morning and hunted for a Panera Bread (my favorite and no luck) a Starbucks (second choice, but no luck) and found a La Madeleine (good choice and good food and good coffee) We ate and headed out for Leakey (good luck finding it on the map, it ain't very big) The drive took us through Johnson City, where we found a nice little winery call Texas Hills with a pretty good cab and a recipe for "mulled" wine, sort of a cider, but made with Merlot..tasty. Then we drove quickly through Fredericksburg and headed for Kerrville. We ate at a place that had originally started out life as a train depot. I had an "Axis" burger, which I assumed was a derivative of the Axis deer, not a statement about the WWII enemy alliance. Good burger, though, with great blue cheese.
Then we settled in for the last leg of the journey to Leakey and the cabin/house we had rented on the Frio river.
There is not a direct route from here to there in that part of the country. You either have to go around a mountain, or to the next river crossing, or find a road that goes all the way through, not many did. But we finally arrived at our destination and it was great. No one around, quiet, cool, late-in-the-day settling time. My buddy Doug went down to the river to fly-fish. He waded to the best looking fishing holes, but did make the comment that they don't call it the Frio for nothing..it was COLD! I pulled out my little spinning reel, made a couple of tosses and lost interest, apparently about a day after the fish had lost interest. So I headed back to house to cook dinner, somewhere in the past couple of decades I decided I would rather cook than fish.
Dinner with close friends may be the best tonic for our high-velocity lives. Banter and jokes, insight and shared troubles, concern for kids and grandkids all flow around a good meal. Breaking bread together is truly a spiritual experience.
Drove deep into the night to pick up the last member of our little band, then back to the cabin around 2AM.

Woke up at 6:30. ready to roll, my bride does not find this endearing. I am somewhat of an extrovert and when I'm up I really look forward to visiting with someone...anyone...even those who would rather be asleep...

What a great Sunday. I had a nap...wait, not just a doze, a real, everyone left the room and me alone, 2 hour dead-to-the-world nap. The wake up disoriented kind of nap. Refreshing and deep..now where did everyone go? I need to tell someone!

Steaks on the grill, a good cabernet, recycling the day. Memories with people who you love.

Our only agenda item for the weekend (a nod to our planner, Janet) was to visit Lost Maples State Park. Breathtaking, particularly the long hikes.
This is my favorite picture of the bunch...my bride and I amongst the lost maples.


Lost Maples..lost weekend.. rediscovered sanity.

Godspeed out there, get a little lost every once in a while. It does the soul good.
Don

18 inches of attitude

Not long ago my bride and I drove north to Lewisville to visit our newest grandson, and of course his parents. As we blasted north we were able to legally participate in the traffic phenomenon known as the HOV lane..high occupancy vehicle. Now, I'm not sure you could really describe two people in a blazer as "high occupancy" We had plenty of room for another two or three. Of course if you were able to squeeze in four or five more, now that would be high occupancy.

Anyway, early in entering the HOV lane the traffic in the regular lanes were moving at the same speed as those of us fortunate to have a travel companion. This was annoying. Why have a lane just for those of us who could cultivate and keep relationships and then move along at the same speed as the loners? Then the most marvelous thing happened, traffic in the regular lanes slowed down! Yes! Now we really have something. With my nose just a little higher in the air, I could really scoot by those lonely suckers in the other lanes.

So we blasted along, smug in our HOV-ness. Going through downtown Dallas the HOV lane disappears. We have been funneled into the crowd. How can it be that one minute you are flying along as one of the privileged, then due to some stupid striping machine you are just another car in a long line of other cars. Eighteen inches separated the attitude of privilege from the beaten masses.

Of course I have been on the other side of the line far more than the privileged side. For years I commuted from south of Dallas to north of Dallas, every day, one hour each way, by myself, hoping that those snobs in the HOV lane would run into a bottleneck and have to watch the rest of us creep by on the right. It would make my day to watch them fume as I slowly drove by, rarely able to hide my smirk.

You see, the attitude is not really on one side of the line or the other. The line is in our head. We divide into people into groups and decide which ones we will feel superior over. In reality circumstances decide when we are privileged and when we are common. We move back and forth over that line as easily as we do when in a car and the line is just so much lead paint on the tarmac. It is always good for me to have to drive on both sides and be disappointed when I realize that the lanes can slow and I can decide how I will handle it.

Boy, if you really want to get me started let me tell you what I think about the grocery store lines.

Godspeed.
Don

This Will Hurt Me More Than You..Or Not

My posts rarely reference a work situation, mainly because I have no idea who reads this blog, and I don't want to create problems at work. With that said, there are situations that we have to deal with at work that reflect our approach to all the different threads in the fabric of our lives.

I had to let a guy go yesterday that I genuinely liked. He was not a particularly good seller, he had a lot going on in his life, and he still didn't get it. But it kills me to intentionally hurt someone. Oh, I can come up with all the rationalizations for the move, his performance affects a lot of people, he had plenty of warning, it was best for the company, blah, blah, blah. The end result is that a guy now has to deal with the big question of "how do I find another place to work in this sorry economy."

As I sat there and explained the rationale, all I could see was the stunned, hurt look on his face. The emotions ran from disbelief, to sadness, then to anger. The feeble attempt to defend himself, his numbers, his action or lack of action were all in vain. But in the end, he just got up and walked away. I felt like a heel.

There is a tendency to assign poor motives to the other person. To make him understand that it was his lack of knowledge, lack of ability, his laziness, whatever that led to this. But somewhere back in my past, it occurred to me that the moment of termination there lies a truism that as his boss I failed. My job in the purest sense is to maximize the talents of those around me, and in this case I didn't do that. It became easier to simply let him go than go through the arduous task of retraining him. I am jealous of those people who can assign blame outside themselves. At some level, this was my fault, along with his. But the suffering will be born by him alone.

So this morning I got up, spent a little extra time in my disciplines, prayed for someone who truly hates my guts at the moment, and ran to the nearest Panera for a bagel and coffee. The really sad part is that now I can move on, still employed, rested from my disciplines...with only a lingering regret. We are a truly perverse animal.

Godspeed. I think I better find someone to be nice to today
Don

It Is Raining

In Texas for the past few months it has been raining. Oh I don't mean the little thundershowers we used to get in Houston everyday, at 2PM, for 22 minutes, which ratcheted the humidity from 95% to 100%. I mean the clouds settling in for days and the rain just comes down. When the sun finally peeks out, it is like walking out of a movie theater from an afternoon matinee. You can't squench your eyes tight enough.
We have definitely had our share of rain.

But this is not the rain I speak of. For months my bride and I have been in deep, intense prayer for each of our children. It is one of those moments where each one had situations in their lives that preoccupied our minds and drove us to our knees in prayer. There were days where I walked around and pleaded with God to resolve this situation or that. Now I know where the caricature of an old man puttering around in his life..muttering. He is praying, constantly, incessantly, asking for some resolution, some small answer to his life's questions over which he is powerless. The rain that I speak of is when God decides to answer the prayers.

I don't know the ins and outs of God's wisdom. He says that our ways are not His ways, that our thoughts are not His thoughts. So I know that there may never be a full understanding of what He does and when and how and why. Here is what I do know. Sometimes He answers all our prayers at once. It is like He keeps placing answers in a big bucket, then at a time of His choosing, he just dumps it out on our lives. Drenching us from head to foot in His blessings. This tends to leave us stunned and in tears, speechless and overwhelmed. At least it does me.

So the other day, in the least likely place I can imagine, He decided to answer. I was sitting in my rent car, having just completed a rather contentious conference call with a customer, when one of my kids called and told me God's answer to almost two years of constant prayer. This on the heels of answering a month of agonizing prayer for our new grandson, and following 20 years of prayer for our oldest. AS I gazed at Camel Rock formation in Northern New Mexico, my eyes blurred and my throat constricted, and my faith regenerated. It rained blessings on a sometimes stubborn, hard to deal with servant in the middle of no where. And so I responded in the only true masculine way I could..I cried, deep, grateful, overwhelmed tears. He rains blessings, I rain tears.

Now the sun is out. The blessings continue to flow, the spiritual earth around me is vibrant again. The spring rains of God's blessings has revitalized the spiritual landscape. God is good..all the time..God is good.

Godspeed. Enjoy the rain, it cools and refreshes the spirit.
Don