Facebook these days is full of folks listing, day by day the things they are thankful for. I appreicate the thought and discernment that goes into that effort. I feel that it is right and appropriate to pause every once in a while and lift a small prayer of thanks for all the ways we are blessed.
From my perspective there are simply too many things to list in a day or month or year. The end result is that I am happy with my life. I wonder how many people can say that? If given the opporutnity, or said a better way, if nothing else changes would this be enough? Would it be enough relationships? enough money? enough health? enough work? enough significance? Would it be enough. And after I go through the inventory my heart goes back to being a happy and satisfied heart. Yes, it would be enough.
But as we know, all things change. Change is the great unchanging. Health will fail, money will be spent, people we love and hold dear will depart, work will dissapooint, significance will fade. Will it be enough then? Can we look around the inventory of our lives and realize that the stockshelves of our satisfaction will slowly empty? What do we have then to be thankful for?
My observation over the past several years has been that old people fall into two major groups. The first group is like my dad. He is active and funny, he is honest and helpful, he is maddeningly short on details about events around him, he is fun to be around. I would say that while most of his life is growing distant in the rearview mirror, he carries great memories and fond thoughts about his life. I sense that he has few regrets. He has taught me to look forward, sometimes I forget and am mired in the past wrongs and hurts. But he has taught me the value of finding hope in the future. There is no one that I know that does not like being around him.
The other group tends to be cranky. I catch myself falling into this group occasionally. I find these folks tend to crane their necks from the driver-side windows to keep old grievances in view, old pains that will not heal, old grudges that can't be released. They look for new grievances to make the old ones strong. They spend their lives in combat with all things and people around them. It is tiring to watch, and as my bride will probably attest, it is tiring to live with. They simply do not have a generosity of spirit that will allow them to be content.
So what am I thankful for? For all of it. A bride who sends me texts when I'm on the road and simply says, "I love you" A thread of hope and future tied to the one person who knows me and loves me best. For kids and kids-in-law and grandkids who make my day as rich as the wealthiest shiek. Who call me Dad, Grandaddy, and "Old Man" and all the names that tells me they love me. For my work, which was absent for so long. For my love of words and what they mean. For my passion about all the things that matter. For my God, who has never been absent, and who sends me notes of love when I least expect it or deserve it. I am thankful for all the pain and hurt and disapointment that this life has handed me because it makes me realize that the deepest joy is birthed from the deepest trauma. I am thankful that God has allowed me to gain some level of discernment, of wisdom about the world and His ways.
Godspeed, it is world of surprises, perhaps the greatest of which is the surprise of contentment in my life. I like this spot on the journey, but trail leads on. We hitch up our packs, help each up, and journey on. I'm thankful for that as well.
Don
