Tuesday, August 2, 2016

A Glimpse of Courage

Every so often I read something or hear something that makes me stop and consider it further. Usually it takes me a moment to figure out why the idea, or story, or thought made me stop. We are inundated with news and comments, opinions (Lord the opinions) views, analysis and it is a task to even begin to accommodate them, much less assimilate them. But this past week something hit me that revealed a sliver of human courage. A type of courage we very rarely see anymore.

I was panning through the AOL news headlines when the face of a toddler popped up on the screen. . "Family of Lane Graves, Toddler Killed in Alligator Attack, Won't Sue Disney" Now toddlers hold a special place for me with four of my grandkids having outgrown this stage, but three still in it. The picture of this little boy twisted my heart as I tried to ponder the despair that his family and, in particular, his parents must be going through. Each of us who have lived for any length of time in this journey know that things happen and the world is shifted in some way. Most of us have had these very circumstances, or close calls, or at least have the empathy to understand how destructive this kind of event can be. We can also understand the anger and frustration of having to cope with a loss so devastating, so encompassing, so...final.

If this were me, I  would be lashing out at anything and everything trying to find a way to equilibrium that probably would never fully arrive. We can say all the trite and threadbare phrases about heaven and God's will and angels. But I will tell you that somewhere in all of that I would be ready and eager to start someone else's suffering for uttering those phrases. From experience I will tell you there are not words to describe the depth and intensity of a 3AM confrontation with a God that has not watched as vigilantly as he could over your little ones. It is at these moments that "righteous anger" takes on a whole new meaning.

So I stopped and read the article. The parents admitted to be being permanently broken. The regret and the confusion and the shame and the despair dripped from every quote. But the article talks about a foundation they set up in little Lane's memory. A purposeful moving on to help. A recognition of the shape of their world and their hearts having been changed forever. In the midst of the devastation of their lives, instead of retribution and blaming, they exhibited a pure and powerful and supernatural courage. It still makes my chest hurt to think of this type of courage. Courage in the face of total loss.

Do I have that type of courage? This was not the courage of sacrificing my life for someone I love. This was sacrificing my right to retaliate, to bring someone to justice, to call to account. Lane was already gone, there was no sacrifice to be made. And as I father and grandfather I will tell you there is not a more helpless feeling than to realize that I could do nothing...nothing. It reminds me again that the courage of the cross, the courage of these parents, the courage of those who have lost it all is the courage it takes to do nothing. To simply let it go.

Godspeed to all out there who have suffered this sort of devastation, to those whose journey will take them to this moment. Courage is not the ability to change the outcome, but the courage in the face of all injustices to do nothing. To look forward, scarred and hurt, and try to find a way to help. Perhaps the courage to understand.

Don